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Game Name The story about John Game Date 01/01/2006 Review Date 10/02/2006
Map John's Pass Rating 8 Reviewer swe_abe
Game Type 1vs1     DOWNLOAD
  Players Team Building Unit Control     Players Team Building Unit Control
Player 1 ANARKY-D A 8 8   Player 5
Player 2 Ape-rocks B 8 8   Player 6
Player 3   Player 7
Player 4   Player 8
Once, there was John.

John was a map. He had a pretty pass in the middle, Ooloks in clever places, and generous resources.

On this map, stuff was built. Lots of it, with different shapes and colours.

Eventually, John got fed up. Being a map was just sooo Cavedog.

So, with a little help from a fat guy from Gibraltar, your friendly next door neighbor Snoop and a few more wankers, John became a construction site.

As a construction site, even more stuff was built. John was happy to see that.

But after a few years with construction workers, John got bored again. All the stupid choke points, wreckage all over the place. It was just sooo 2003.

John sat down and thought about his creation. The solution, he realised, was to extend his middle finger to all units except one, the Hawk. What a nice unit. No wreckage anywhere. No matter how many. They kept the place clean.

And thus John became the Hawk Race Track.

Lately, John has realised that he's become a decorated version of Oooweeee. But fuck it, says John, at least it's pretty.

Game was alright. Big ass file. 13 megs of Hawks.